Skip to content

Wise men say that time is like a river. I say time is like a river of SHIT... and as you float down that river in your little canoe, your paddles are getting smaller and smaller.

— Lewis Black Last Laugh ‘06 (2006)

Another quote →

More quotes by Lewis Black

If anyone is as angry as I am, it's the good people of Detroit.

Stark Raving Black (2010)

I'm only allowed to say 'fuck' twelve times.

The Carnegie Hall Performance (2006)

FEMA? I always thought it was a bone here in your ass.

Red, White, and Screwed (2006)

I'll tell ya, in New York City, where I've lived far too long, 'fuck' isn't even a word, it's a comma.

The White Album (2000)

I don't know if you noticed, but our two-party system is a bowl of shit looking in the mirror at itself.

Stark Raving Black (2010)

All Lewis Black quotes →

Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Lewis Black (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.