"Scouting for the Reaper," Virginia Quarterly Review (Summer 2009)
Nothing sells tombstones like a Girl Scout in uniform.
If God wanted teenagers to be abstinent, puberty would begin at twenty.
The boss is never your friend, even if you're sleeping with him.
Be optimistic. Always put on clean underwear if you're going on a date.
Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Jacob M. Appel (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.