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A "hero" is any man who does his job. You a lot of times see headlines that are like, "hero tutor teaches after school", and you're like, yeah.

— John Mulaney New in Town (2012)

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Heroes

More quotes by John Mulaney

If you’re an adult male who sees no flaws in his father, you’re an insane person.

Real estate agents have to deal with the dumbest people in the world making the biggest decisions of their lives.

The Comeback Kid (2015)

Apparently I have no boundaries. And I need 'em.

I dislike the Founding Fathers immensely.

It is so much easier not to do things than to do them that you would do anything is totally remarkable.

New in Town (2012)

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Heroing is one of the shortest-lived professions there is.

Will Rogers

The grandest of heroic deeds are those which are performed within four walls and in domestic privacy.

Jean Paul Dictionary of Burning Words of Brilliant Writers (1895)

The blood of the heroes is closer to God than the ink of the philosophers and the prayers of the faithful.

Julius Evola Revolt Against the Modern World (1934)

Heroism is a myth you tell idealistic young people—specifically when you want them to go bleed for you.

Brandon Sanderson Rhythm of War (2020)

Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: John Mulaney (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.