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For those of you who aren't Catholic, I don't mean to exclude you, although we love to exclude you.

— John Mulaney The Comeback Kid (2015)

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Love

More quotes by John Mulaney

If you’re an adult male who sees no flaws in his father, you’re an insane person.

Real estate agents have to deal with the dumbest people in the world making the biggest decisions of their lives.

The Comeback Kid (2015)

Apparently I have no boundaries. And I need 'em.

I dislike the Founding Fathers immensely.

It is so much easier not to do things than to do them that you would do anything is totally remarkable.

New in Town (2012)

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Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind,
And therefore is wing'd Cupid painted blind.

William Shakespeare A Midsummer Night's Dream (1595)

To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead.

Bertrand Russell Marriage and Morals (1929)

Not for the body, but for the heart; companion and company are needed.

Sanu Sharma

Love seldom haunts the breast where learning lies,
And Venus sets ere Mercury can rise.

Alexander Pope

Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: John Mulaney (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.