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I find a lot of comfort in having one sex partner. That is because she knows what I like and I know what she won't do.

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More quotes by Ron White

I didn't get where I am today by worryin' about how I'd feel tomorrow.

I get that Speedo on, it looks like a rubber band stretched over a head of cauliflower.

I'm sweating scotch out of every pore in my body.

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade. And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.

We take the money we make from selling the rest of Florida to Israel, we buy Mexico, fix it up and flip it!

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Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Ron White (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.