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I once went to one of those parties where everyone throws their car keys into the middle of the room. I don’t know who got my moped but I’ve been driving that Peugeot for years.

— Victoria Wood

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More quotes by Victoria Wood

Sometimes I think that being widowed is God's way of telling you to come off the pill.

Victoria Wood: As Seen on TV (1985)

We'd like to apologise to our viewers in the North - it must be awful for you.

Victoria Wood: As Seen on TV (1985)

Where are you in the menstrual cycle?
Taurus.

People think I hate sex. I don’t. I just don’t like things that stop you seeing the television properly.

The Italians have got opera, the Spanish have got flamenco dancing. What have we got? Weight Watchers.

All Victoria Wood quotes →

Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Victoria Wood (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.