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Business was so bad the other night the orchestra was playing "Tea for One."

— Henny Youngman Don't Put My Name on this Book (1976)

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Source and credibility

Wikiquote does not flag this quote as disputed or misattributed.

Source: Don't Put My Name on this Book (1976), p. 92
Work: Don't Put My Name on this Book, 1976
Source quality: Precise citation Points to a specific work with a page, chapter, date or similar locator, so you can look it up.

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My wife will buy anything marked down. Last year she bought an escalator.

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My wife is on a new diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost weight, but can she climb a tree.

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My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea.

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Business

More quotes by Henny Youngman

My first Hollywood picture wasn't released, it escaped.

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

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I was so ugly when I was born, the doctor slapped my mother

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.

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Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Henny Youngman (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.