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Listen, the weather is just like Hillary's explanation for her war vote: we just don't know, do we?

— Dennis Miller The Buck Starts Here (2007)

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War

More quotes by Dennis Miller

And remember, when we talk of the fittest, it is all about the context. Sure, the lion is king of the jungle but airdrop him into Antarctica, & he's just a penguin's bitch.

The American education system couldn't be more badly directed or poorly funded if the Secretary of Education were Ed Wood.

South African schoolchildren set a world record this week by creating the world's longest clothesline. Hey, what do South Africans wash their clothes with? Apar-Tide!

At one time, Washington actually meant something. But now, it's about as relevant as Bob Dylan's tuning fork.

I think the American legal system sucks worse than a Celine Dion cover version of "Whole Lotta Love."

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All religions, arts and sciences are branches of the same tree. All these aspirations are directed toward ennobling man's life, lifting it from the sphere of mere physical existence and leading the individual towards freedom.

Albert Einstein Moral Decay (1937)

The last half of the 20th century will seem like a wild party for rich kids, compared to what's coming now.

Hunter S. Thompson

Only the dead have seen the end of war.

George Santayana Soliloquies in England and Later Soliloquies (1922)

Wars produce many stories of fiction, some of which are told until they are believed to be true.

Ulysses S. Grant Personal Memoirs of General U. S. Grant (1885)

Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Dennis Miller (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.