Bill Cosby Quotes
born 1937 United States
William Henry "Bill" Cosby, Jr. Ed.D (born 12 July 1937) is an American actor, comedian, television producer, and author.
- United States
- Activists
- Actors
- Non-fiction authors
- Singer-songwriters
Also known as: Bill Cosby: Himself
Random Bill Cosby quote
17 quotes
Let the message be known to bigots and racists that they don’t count!
The weatherman is always right, It's his timing that's off.
The only thing that you can get into without a lot of trouble is a lot of trouble.
If at first you don't succeed, you're about average.
Fathers are the geniuses of the house because only a person as intelligent as we could fake such stupidity.
Himself (1983)
Dentists tell you not to pick your teeth with any sharp metal object. Then you sit in their chair, and the first thing they grab is an iron hook.
Himself (1983)
Because of my father, between the ages 7 through 15, I thought my name was "Jesus Christ."
Carol Burnett put it best when she described labor pains. She said, "Take your bottom lip, and pull it over your head."
Himself (1983)
My wife and I have five children, and the reason we have five children is because we do not want six.
Himself (1983)
My father walked to school 4 o'clock every morning with no shoes on, uphill, both ways, in 5 feet of snow and he was thankful.
I have never changed my stance nor my story. I have always maintained my innocence. Thank you to all my fans, supporters and friends who stood by me through this ordeal. Special thanks to the Pennsylvania Supreme Court for upholding the rules of law.
A person with no children says, "Well I just love children," and you say "Why?" and they say, "Because a child is so truthful, that's what I love about 'em — they tell the truth." That's a lie, I've got five of 'em. The only time they tell the truth is if they're having pain.
Himself (1983)
I am not interested in statistics that tell me things are not as bad as they seem. Things are horrible. I have met people crying about what is happening, but there is no solution yet. Our children are trying to tell us something, and we are not listening. I don't care what the statistics say.
People putting their clothes on backwards. Isn't that a sign of something going on wrong? Are you not paying attention? People with their hat on backwards, pants down around the crack. Isn't that a sign of something or are you waiting for Jesus to pull his pants up?
I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
Misattributed
The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague.
Misattributed
[Eddie Murphy imitating Bill Cosby's voice] "Yooouuu can not say filth flarn filth flarn filth in front of people." And I said, "I never said no 'filth flarn filth'!" He said, "You know what I'm talking about. I can't use the type of language that you use, but you know what I mean when I say 'filth flarn flarn flarn filth'." And I said, "I never said no 'filth flarn filth', and I don't know what you're talking about, and I'm offended that you called. Fuck you." And that's when Bill got pissed. "That's what I'm talking about! Yoooouuuu cannot say... 'fuck'!"
Attributed