Any brother of mine and I make one person, as do a good man and his good wife.
Marriage Quotes
The page is a long argument between people for marriage and people who found it funny, with Shakespeare supplying the most entries on both sides. George Bernard Shaw, in Man and Superman (1903), said the confusion of marriage with morality had done more to destroy the conscience of the human race than any other error. Victor Hugo, in Les Misérables, said the best way to worship God is to love your wife. Disraeli, in Lothair (1870), thought every woman should marry, and no man.
Two famous items are flagged as misattributed. “By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher” is credited to Socrates, but its origin is unknown. The exchange in which Lady Astor offers to poison Churchill’s coffee is credited to Churchill. Both are better as stories than as evidence.
Marriages are arranged in heaven but the bills must be paid here on earth.
The first breath of adultery is the freest; after it, constraints aping marriage develop.
If you can't sleep with your own wife wearing a false beard, what can you do?
"What you doin' with such a big ol' dog in New York?" "Never had a wife."