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I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood. Especially if it's me!

— George Carlin A Place for My Stuff (1981)

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Christianity

More quotes by George Carlin

Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that shit.

Brain Droppings (1997)

One great thing about getting old is that you can get out of all sorts of social obligations just by saying you're tired.

It's Bad for Ya (2008)

If people stand in a circle long enough, they'll eventually begin to dance.

Napalm and Silly Putty (2001)

It's called the American dream because you have to be asleep to believe it.

The future will soon be a thing of the past.

Napalm and Silly Putty (2001)

All George Carlin quotes →

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Must then a Christ perish in torment in every age to save those that have no imagination?

George Bernard Shaw Saint Joan (1923)

The whole religious complexion of the modern world is due to the absence, from Jerusalem, of a lunatic asylum.

Havelock Ellis

Christianity offers reasons for not fearing death or the universe, and in so doing it fails to teach adequately the virtue of courage.

Bertrand Russell Education and the Social Order (1932)

Christianity neither is, nor ever was, a part of the common law [this quote is referring to English Common Law].

Thomas Jefferson Vol. 1 Whether Christianity is Part of the Common Law (1764)

Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: George Carlin (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.