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"'Press Control to calm yourself'." [breathes and presses Control key] "Oh, that just crouches me. How does that calm myself?"

— Markiplier Calm Time (2013)

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"Little piggy no no little piggy go home!"

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"And now it says 'press B to blow.' Really?"

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"Oh, if that blue bastard, is just stickin' around -" [find a candle stand, which startles him] *gasp* "...That's new!"

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"…Dammit, where the hell are these guys? They're nowhere to be found."

Calm Time (2013)

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Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Markiplier (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.