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Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with someone long-term, the last people I would introduce him to would be my family.

— Chelsea Handler Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea (2008)

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More quotes by Chelsea Handler

It became clear when I got in my car that Persians are only really good for two things. Oil and hummus.

Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea (2008)

He laid into me with the same gusto as a right-wing political pundit on the O'Reilly Factor defending President's Bush right to vacation six days out of the week.

Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea (2008)

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Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Chelsea Handler (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.