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Astronomy teaches the correct use of the sun and the planets. These may be put on a frame of little sticks and turned round. This causes the tides.

— Stephen Leacock Literary lapses (1918)

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More quotes by Stephen Leacock

Advertising may be described as the science of arresting human intelligence long enough to get money from it.

It is to be observed that "angling" is the name given to fishing by people who can't fish.

Americans are queer people: they can't rest.

With the thermometer at 30 below zero and the wind behind him, a man walking on Main Street in Winnipeg knows which side of him is which.

My Discovery of the West (1937)

Lord Ronald said nothing; he flung himself from the room, flung himself upon his horse and rode madly off in all directions.

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Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Stephen Leacock (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.