Skip to content

A Ph.D. in microbiology is not necessary to grasp the concept: Clean water is good. Poopy water is bad.

— Carl Hiaasen

Another quote →

Source and credibility

Wikiquote does not flag this quote as disputed or misattributed.

Source: "Modern world puts evolution into reverse", July 6, 1995 (reprinted in Kick-Ass: Selected Columns)
Source quality: Precise citation Points to a specific work with a page, chapter, date or similar locator, so you can look it up.

More by Carl Hiaasen

Admiring the silken calfskin sheaths, Chaz felt a knot of remorse in his gut. It passed momentarily, like acid reflux. (Chapter 1)

Skinny Dip (2004)

"Lady, do I look like a bleeping babysitter?"
"He nearly died."
"Yeah, because he's a fool. There's no known cure for that." (Chapter 6)

Chomp (2012)

All Carl Hiaasen quotes →

More quotes by Carl Hiaasen

I try not to stand on a soapbox and scream. That's boring. You've got to be funny sometimes. All my humor comes from anger. Satire is terrific therapy. Making people laugh is a joy, but making them think about something serious is the ultimate reward.

The dog proved to be as dumb and stubborn as a mud fence, so Stranahan had named him Strom. (Chapter 2)

Skinny Dip (2004)

"I know you're not a stupid person, so why would you ask such a stunningly stupid question?" (Chapter 28)

Squeeze Me (2020)

"In my business, fear is a sane and very healthy emotion. That's because death and disaster aren't abstractions. They're as goddamn real as real can be." (Chapter 5)

Lucky You (1997)

"'The mind, once stretched by a new idea, never returns to its original dimensions.' That's from Emerson, by the way. All I was hoping to do is stretch some goddamn minds." (Epilogue)

Squeeze Me (2020)

All Carl Hiaasen quotes →

Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Carl Hiaasen (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.