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Carl Hiaasen Quotes
born 1953 United States
Carl Andrew Hiaasen (born March 12, 1953) is an American author and columnist, who wrote (until March 2021) a long-running opinion column for The Miami Herald, for which he has also worked as an investigative reporter. He has also published (as of 2020) twenty-two novels (including five for children and young adults), and several humorous non-fiction books.
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8 quotes
A Ph.D. in microbiology is not necessary to grasp the concept: Clean water is good. Poopy water is bad.
I try not to stand on a soapbox and scream. That's boring. You've got to be funny sometimes. All my humor comes from anger. Satire is terrific therapy. Making people laugh is a joy, but making them think about something serious is the ultimate reward.
The dog proved to be as dumb and stubborn as a mud fence, so Stranahan had named him Strom. (Chapter 2)
Skinny Dip (2004)
"I know you're not a stupid person, so why would you ask such a stunningly stupid question?" (Chapter 28)
Squeeze Me (2020)
"In my business, fear is a sane and very healthy emotion. That's because death and disaster aren't abstractions. They're as goddamn real as real can be." (Chapter 5)
Lucky You (1997)
"'The mind, once stretched by a new idea, never returns to its original dimensions.' That's from Emerson, by the way. All I was hoping to do is stretch some goddamn minds." (Epilogue)
Squeeze Me (2020)
Admiring the silken calfskin sheaths, Chaz felt a knot of remorse in his gut. It passed momentarily, like acid reflux. (Chapter 1)
Skinny Dip (2004)
"Lady, do I look like a bleeping babysitter?" "He nearly died." "Yeah, because he's a fool. There's no known cure for that." (Chapter 6)
Chomp (2012)
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