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Sam Kinison Quotes
1953–1992 United States
Samuel Burl "Sam" Kinison (December 8, 1953 – April 10, 1992) was an American stand-up comedian and actor. Kinison was known for his intense, harsh and politically incorrect humor.
United States Actors Comedians Stand-up comedians Random Sam Kinison quote
10 quotes
"I just got shot in the ass with an infected load of semen! Who's the smart-ass?"
How does a guy look at another guy's hairy ass, and find love?
HBO Special (1985)
"They beat us, they beat us, they made us do their BLOW!
"Here's my man! It doesn't have to stay out and party with his guys!" "Here, let me see that...It doesn't seem to be able to pick up the fucking check, does it?"
There's always 30 or 40 Christians standing around, saying, "It's a shame that he has to die." And Jesus is saying, "Well, maybe I wouldn't have to if somebody would get a ladder and pair of pliers!!"
HBO Special (1985)
Today we're going to try and say his name...OH! OHHH! Can you even say a part of his name--OH! OHHH!"
Louder Than Hell (1986)
I was MARRIED for TWO FUCKING YEARS! Hell would be like Club Med!
HBO Special (1985)
We don't WANT to drink and drive ... But there's no other way to get the fucking CAR back to the HOUSE!! How are we supposed to get fucking home??!!
HBO Special (1985)
Oh, god, where's the fuckin' bottle, you fuckin' whore?! DID HE FUCK YOU WITH THIS TOO?! Yes-- OH, SHUT UP!!! HE DID EVERYTHING TO YOU, OH, GOD!!!!
YOU FUCKING WHORE!!! You used me! You never loved me! I hope you slide under a gas truck and taste your fucking own blood! DIE! DIE! DIE! I want my records back! I want my fucking records back!
Louder Than Hell (1986)
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