Karl Pilkington Quotes
born 1972 England
Karl Pilkington (born 23 September 1972) is an English podcaster, author and former radio producer.
- England
- Actors
- Comedians
- Radio producers
Random Karl Pilkington quote
123 quotes
Just pop it on your wrist. - Ricky asks Karl how his 'invention' of a watch that counts down your life would actually work.
That's what I'm saying about Christmas, I might not be in the mood for it; December 25th
On dopplegangers - How would I know which one I was?
Don't be chucking that out. You might need that later - Karl interprets the phrase Waste not, want not.
Fella comes walking toward me. Only got no pants on. So I said, ‘Suzanne, what's going on?’
Flies used to be happy-go-lucky, on their own; the sun’s out, have a fly about. Now, there’s little attacks going on.
The best thing you can do is look after yourself. Get on with it.
It's not going to change the world. But neither did the egg-cup.
If you live in a glass house, don't be chucking stuff about. - Karl interprets the phrase Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.
Why is it alright to be going around, going mental with a gun, shooting all the monkeys and killing them? Because one day we're going to run out.
People moan about drugs being tested on animals. I sort of think it depends innit. If the drug's aspirin and the monkey's got a headache, is it right?
That's the problem with them fables, they're putting animals together that wouldn't meet. I don't know where a scorpion is knockin' around with a frog.
You don't have to do it straight away, but just do it before it gets really bad - Karl re-evaluates the phrase A stitch in time saves nine.
As long as you're rememberin' baby Jesus, does it matter when you're rememberin' 'im[Karl on how he hates Christmas being the same date each year]
People who live in a glass house have to answer the door - Karl invents his own phrase based on Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.
Language is a powerful thing init...er...
"I've got to make sure the groom's hat's on straight." That's when you know an event's overstaffed.
If there's one thing we haven't cracked yet in human civilsation, we've never been able to make a good wig. I wouldn't want a wig on me.
Who's the mental one here? Is it me, or everyone else?
I think some bacteria have better lives than that [Karls interpretation on the life of an innuit]