57 quotes
The belief system that if you smiled hard enough into the face of God, you would eventually shit money.
Yeah, Yeah (2011)
They have sheets of ham so large that if you bite out the middle, you've saved yourself the price of a poncho.
Like, Totally (2006)
It sounds like typewriters eating tin foil being kicked down the stairs.
Like, Totally (2006)
You should be as alive as you can, until you're totally dead!
What It Is (2009)
"This is our Smeg fridge, the whole house is made of Smeg. We're made of Smeg, aren't we, Roy?" "Yes, dear."
Monster (2004)
"Well, you know what they say about John, anyway?"
Monster (2004)
What's going on? What do we do now? "Don't fuck anybody or you die! Never mind, here comes MC Hammer."
Monster (2004)
Days are stupid length. They are just long enough to get regret and then you have to go to bed.
Yeah, Yeah (2011)
It's not even a drink. It's a way for having the cops around without using a phone.
What It Is (2009)
You learn very very quickly that it is mostly about swearing, actually. That's all you're doing, swearing, in a box with wheels.
Like, Totally (2006)
Adulthood feels like walking around in the desert with a bag over your head, being bumped into by people who rob you as they bore you.
What It Is (2009)
- I know what you're thinking!
What It Is (2009)
You laugh at the North, you think they’re all funny little short people who live in a big pie. Trying to sort out their relationship with the definite article. Throwing darts at their dinner.
Yeah, Yeah (2011)
You're looking for a lump in a bag of lumps, that can take some time
Monster (2004)
Scotland, the country where they fry the food five times to make sure it’s dead; the country where they invented bacon flavour mouthwash.
Yeah, Yeah (2011)
I can't relax here. These people have no pubic hair anywhere. We have pubic hair on the ceiling.
Monster (2004)
Men look at breasts the way women look at babies. 'Aw, isn't that lovely.'.
Like, Totally (2006)
It should not be an act of social disobedience to light a cigarette... unless you're actually a doctor working at an incubator.
Monster (2004)
"What dya mean theres no fackin chips, I come ere on a plane, you cunt! I've got children ere, what am I spose to do with this fackin tomato fiasco."
Monster (2004)
You're supposed to eat the cows. They're great big lumbering stupid things - they'd be everywhere if we didn't eat them.
Like, Totally (2006)