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Jack Spink was fond of drink,
His wife preferred to eat;
For eats is eats and wets is wets
And never the twain shall meet.

— Newman Levy

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Marriage

More quotes by Newman Levy

The monk says, "That's a joke on me, for that there dame to croak on me.
I hadn't oughter passed her up the time I had the chance."

Opera Guyed (1923)

Let us veil the tragic sequel, for a pious man but weak will
Find, alas, that he's unequal to a lady's potent charms.
So his long suppressed libido, sharp as steel of famed Toledo,
Spurning prayers and hymns and credo, found surcease in Sadie's arms.

Theatre Guyed (1933)

One time, in Alexandria, in wicked Alexandria,
Where nights were wild with revelry and life was but a game,
There lived, so the report is, an adventuress and courtesan,
The pride of Alexandria, and Thais was her name.

Opera Guyed (1923)

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The confusion of marriage with morality has done more to destroy the conscience of the human race than any other single error.

George Bernard Shaw Man and Superman (1903)

Men marry because they are tired; women because they are curious. Both are disappointed.

Oscar Wilde A Woman of No Importance (1893)

A man is in general better pleased when he has a good dinner upon his table, than when his wife talks Greek.

Samuel Johnson

The best way to worship God is to love your wife.

Victor Hugo Les Misérables (1862)

Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Newman Levy (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.