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By the way if I miss, during the evening, saying something offensive to you, insulting your sexual proclivity, your physical disability, your race, your religion, your sex, anything, please, raise your hand. I’ll get to you, I promise. I’ll say something really nasty.

— Harlan Ellison Autograph profile (2010)

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More quotes by Harlan Ellison

It is my lot to wake with anger every morning, to lie down at night even angrier.

Shatterday (1980)

This is a test. Take notes. This will count as 3/4 of your final grade.

Deathbird Stories (1975)

Posing the question: does the god of love use underarm deodorant, vaginal spray and fluoride toothpaste?

Deathbird Stories (1975)

Don't start an argument with somebody who has a microphone when you don't. They'll make you look like chopped liver.

There’s only one real evil in the world: mediocrity.

All Harlan Ellison quotes →

Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Harlan Ellison (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.