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Three blind mice walk into a pub. But they are unaware of their surroundings, so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

— Bill Bailey Part Troll (2004)

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More quotes by Bill Bailey

I'm sort of like a post-modern vegetarian; I eat meat ironically.

Part Troll (2004)

It's always been my long-held belief that eventually insects will take over the world.

Remarkable Guide to the Orchestra (2008)

James Blunt - a man who recently got voted more annoying than paper cuts.

Dandelion Mind (2010)

There's more evil in the charts than in an Al-Qaeda suggestion box.

Part Troll (2004)

Orchestras have often been used to conjure up the natural world: Swans, sharks, trout, but not, as far as I know, the often maligned jellyfish.

Remarkable Guide to the Orchestra (2008)

All Bill Bailey quotes →

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Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Bill Bailey (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.