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Since Switzerland has nothing else to identify it…and since both its national products, snow and chocolate, melt, the cuckoo clock was invented solely in order to give tourists something solid to remember it by.

— Alan Coren The Sanity Inspector (1974)

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More quotes by Alan Coren

Apart from cheese and tulips, the main product of the country is advocaat, a drink made from lawyers.

The Sanity Inspector (1974)

Strictly speaking, the land does not exist; it is merely dehydrated sea.

The Sanity Inspector (1974)

Having lost the last war, they are currently enjoying a Wirtschaftswunder, which can be briefly translated as "The best way to own a Mercedes is to build one."

The Sanity Inspector (1974)

I rang room service, and asked for a bottle of Perrier, because while I was asleep someone had come in and carpeted my throat.

The Sanity Inspector (1974)

Disneyworld ... is a historical reconstruction as sanitised as the Kremlin's, and a future vision as uncognisant of contemporary pointers as Peter Pan's. It is a magic carpet under which everything has been swept.

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Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Alan Coren (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.