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I handed in a script last year and the studio didn't change one word. The word they didn't change was on page 87.

— Steve Martin

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More quotes by Steve Martin

A kiss may not be the truth, but it is what we wish were true.

As Harris K. Telemacher in L.A. Story (1991)

Hosting the Oscars is like making love to a beautiful woman — it's something I only get to do when Billy Crystal's out of town.

Hosting the 73rd Academy Awards (2001)

Why is it we don't always recognize the moment when love begins, but we always know when it ends?

As Harris K. Telemacher in L.A. Story (1991)

You kill me and I'll see that you never work in this town again.

As Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr in The Man with Two Brains (1983)

It was so sweet backstage, you should have seen it — The Teamsters were helping Michael Moore into the trunk of his limo.

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Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Steve Martin (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.