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‘Suppose your Aunt Dahlia read in the paper one morning that you were going to be shot at sunrise.’
‘I couldn’t be, I’m never up so early.’

— P. G. Wodehouse Jeeves in the Offing (1960)

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More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse

Love has had a lot of press-agenting from the oldest times; but there are higher, nobler things than love.

The Clicking Of Cuthbert (1922)

It is pretty generally admitted that few of them were to be trusted within reach of a trowel and a pile of bricks.

Never put anything on paper, my boy, and never trust a man with a small black moustache.

Cocktail Time (1958)

There is enough sadness in life without having fellows like Gussie Fink-Nottle going about in sea boots.

Right Ho, Jeeves (1934)

It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.

Blandings Castle (1935)

All P. G. Wodehouse quotes →

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Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: P. G. Wodehouse (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.