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For ten years Caesar ruled with an iron hand. Then with a wooden foot, and finally with a piece of string.

— Spike Milligan

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Source and credibility

Wikiquote does not flag this quote as disputed or misattributed.

Source: The Goon Show, Season 7, Episode 25: "The Histories of Pliny the Elder" (28 March 1957)
Source quality: Precise citation Points to a specific work with a page, chapter, date or similar locator, so you can look it up.

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A lot of learning can
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I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.

God made night
But
Man made darkness.

On the Ning Nang Nong
When the cows go bong!

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Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.

If a man dies when you hang him, keep hanging him until he gets used to it.

Are you going to come along quietly, or am I going to have to use ear plugs?

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Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Spike Milligan (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.