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They're not going to teach science at all. What they do is take the science students down to the lake, tie them in burlap sacks and throw them in. If God thinks they're good science students, they float.

— Paula Poundstone

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More quotes by Paula Poundstone

I have terrible short-term memory loss, which I like to think of as Presidential eligibility.

I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name and apparently that's the key to the whole thing right there. I go in every few weeks and guess.

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Attribution

Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Paula Poundstone (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.