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Quotes from That Was the Year That Was — Tom Lehrer

1928–2025 United States

← All quotes by Tom Lehrer

18 quotes

I feel that if a person can't communicate, the very least he can do is to shut up.

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

Last December 13th, there appeared in the newspapers the juiciest, spiciest, raciest obituary it has ever been my pleasure to read.

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

It's people like that who make you realize how little you've accomplished. It is a sobering thought, for example, that when Mozart was my age, he had been dead for two years.

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

I feel that if any songs are gonna come out of World War III, we'd better start writing them now.

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

Step up and shake the hand
Of someone you can't stand,
You can tolerate him if you try!

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

But don't panic. Base eight is just like base ten really — if you're missing two fingers.

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

It's only for a week so have no fear!
Be grateful that it doesn't last all year!

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

And that is the story of Alma,
Who knew how to receive and to give.
The body that reached her embalma'
Was one that had known how to live.

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

Oh, the poor folks hate the rich folks,
And the rich folks hate the poor folks.
All of my folks hate all of your folks,
It's American as apple pie.

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another, and I know there are people in the world who do not love their fellow human beings — and I hate people like that!

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

The loveliest girl in Vienna
Was Alma, the smartest as well.
Once you picked her up on your antenna,
You'd never be free of her spell.

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

So get down upon your knees,
Fiddle with your rosaries,
Bow your head with great respect,
And genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

I do have a cause, though. It is obscenity. I'm for it.

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

Oh, the white folks hate the black folks,
And the black folks hate the white folks;
To hate all but the right folks
Is an old established rule.

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

Don't say that he's hypocritical,
Say rather that he's apolitical.
"Once the rockets are up, who cares where they come down?
That's not my department," says Wernher von Braun.

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

Oh, the Protestants hate the Catholics
And the Catholics hate the Protestants,
And the Hindus hate the Moslems,
And everybody hates the Jews.

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

Get in line in that processional,
Step into that small confessional.
There the guy who's got religion'll
Tell you if your sin's original.
If it is, try playin' it safer,
Drink the wine and chew the wafer,
Two, four, six, eight,
Time to transubstantiate!

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

Any ideas expressed on this record should not be taken as representing Mr. Lehrer's true convictions, for indeed he has none. "If anyone objects to any statement I make," he has said, "I am quite prepared not only to retract it, but also to deny under oath that I ever made it."

That Was the Year That Was (1965)

Attribution

Quotes and notes from Wikiquote: Tom Lehrer (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0.