96 quotes
We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just stuff that works.
The Salmon of Doubt (2002)
"He was constantly reminded of how startlingly different a place the world was when viewed from a point only three feet to the left."
The Salmon of Doubt (2002)
"Stotting" is jumping upward with all four legs simultaneously. My advice: do not die until you've seen a large black poodle stotting in the snow.
The Salmon of Doubt (2002)
FAIRYMOUNT (vb. n.) Polite word for buggery.
The Meaning of Liff (1983)
"My name is Kate Schechter. Two 'c's, two 'h's, two 'e's, and also a 't', an 'r', and an 's'. Provided they're all there the bank won't be fussy about the order they come in. They never seem to know themselves."
The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul (1988)
It was his subconscious which told him this — that infuriating part of a person's brain which never responds to interrogation, merely gives little meaningful nudges and then sits humming quietly to itself, saying nothing.
The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul (1988)
"Solutions nearly always come from the direction you least expect, which means there's no point trying to look in that direction because it won't be coming from there."
The Salmon of Doubt (2002)
You would probably not say that he was sleeping the sleep of the just, unless you meant the just asleep, but it was certainly the sleep of someone who was not fooling about when he climbed into bed of a night and turned off the light.
The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul (1988)
One of the problems has to do with the speed of light and the difficulties involved in trying to exceed it. You can't. Nothing travels faster than the speed of light with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own special laws.
Mostly Harmless (1992)
They even keep it on at weekends. Someone was bound to notice sooner or later.
Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (1987)
CLIXBY (adj.) Politely rude. Briskly vague. Firmly uninformative.
The Meaning of Liff (1983)
ABOYNE (vb.) To beat an expert at a game of skill by playing so appallingly badly that none of his clever tactics or strategies are of any use to him.
The Meaning of Liff (1983)
Always expecting this and expecting that. May I recommend serenity to you? A life that is burdened with expectations is a heavy life. Its fruit is sorrow and disappointment. Learn to be one with the joy of the moment.
The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul (1988)
Of all the races in the Galaxy, only the English could possibly revive the memory of the most horrific wars ever to sunder the Universe and transform it into what I'm afraid is generally regarded as an incomprehensibly dull and pointless game.
Life the Universe and Everything (1982)
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
The Restaurant at the End of the Universe (1980)
SHOEBURYNESS (abs.n.) The vague uncomfortable feeling you get when sitting on a seat which is still warm from somebody else's bottom
The Meaning of Liff (1983)
If we think that the world is here for us we will continue to destroy it the way we have been destroying it, because we think we can do no harm.
Parrots, the Universe and Everything (2001)
The door was the way to... to... The Door was The Way. Good. Capital letters were always the best way of dealing with things you didn't have a good answer to.
Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (1987)
...my methods of navigation have their advantage. I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.
The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul (1988)
My own strategy is to find a car, or the nearest equivalent, which looks as if it knows where it's going and follow it. I rarely end up where I was intending to go, but often I end up somewhere I needed to be.
The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul (1988)