Douglas Adams Quotes

1952–2001 England

Douglas Noel Adams (11 March 1952 – 11 May 2001) was an English author and satirist, best known for his The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy scripts and books.

England
Essayists
Novelists
Radio producers
Satirists

Also known as: Adams, Douglas, Douglas Noel Adams, Douglas Noël Adams, Douglas adams, Dirk Gently, The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul

Random Douglas Adams quote

96 quotes

Anything invented after you're thirty-five is against the natural order of things.

The Salmon of Doubt (2002)

In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.

The Restaurant at the End of the Universe (1980)

The story so far: In the Beginning, the universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (1979)

The last time anybody made a list of the top hundred character attributes of New Yorkers, common sense snuck in at number 79.

How can I tell that the past isn't a fiction designed to account for the discrepancy between my immediate physical sensations and my state of mind?

The Restaurant at the End of the Universe (1980)

We are stuck with technology when all we really want is just stuff that works. How do you recognize something that is still technology? A good clue is if it comes with a manual.

The Salmon of Doubt: Hitchhiking the Galaxy One Last Time (2002)

Paradoxes are just the scar tissue. Time and space heal themselves up around them and people simply remember a version of events which makes as much sense as they require it to make.

Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (1987)

It's a tough galaxy. If you want to survive, you've gotta know...where your towel is.

He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.

Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable, let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all.

Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (1987)

If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family Anatidae on our hands.

Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (1987)

It's all rather complicated, but it makes a kind of sense if you think about it for a while.

The Salmon of Doubt (2002)

LAXOBIGGING (ptcpl.vb.) Struggling to extrude an extremely large turd.

The Meaning of Liff (1983)

WOKING (vb.) To enter the kitchen with the precise determination to perform something only to forget what it is just before you do it.

The Meaning of Liff (1983)

Ford carried on counting quietly. This is about the most aggressive thing you can do to a computer, the equivalent of going up to a human being and saying “Blood...blood...blood...blood...”

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (1979)

Any man that can hitch the length and breadth of the Galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through and still know where his towel is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (1978)

I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.

The Salmon of Doubt (2002)

When you are a student or whatever, and you can't afford a car, or a plane fare, or even a train fare, all you can do is hope that someone will stop and pick you up.

Any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through, and still know where his towel is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with.

Dennis Hutch had stepped up into the top seat when its founder had died of a lethal overdose of brick wall, taken while under the influence of a Ferrari and a bottle of tequila.

The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul (1988)

Attribution

Quotes and notes from Wikiquote: Douglas Adams (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0.