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Today I interviewed a squirrel in my backyard and then threw to commercial. Somebody help me.

— Conan O'Brien

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More quotes by Conan O'Brien

There are few things more liberating in this life than having your worst fear realized.

I just want to say to the kids out there watching: You can do anything you want in life. Unless Jay Leno wants to do it too.

All I ask of you is one thing: please don't be cynical. I hate cynicism - it's my least favorite quality and it doesn't lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you're kind, amazing things will happen.

I'm trying to avoid that thing where you get a story in your head that's very clean. I think there are too many people that come up with a very simple story where they're the hero, and they don't learn anything.

Now that this mess is almost behind me – I just have one last request: HBO, when you make the movie about this whole NBC late night fiasco, I’d like to be played by Academy-Award winning actress Tilda Swinton.

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Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Conan O'Brien (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.