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I have a simple policy: If the combined age of the two people feuding is over 100, they should move on.

— Adam Carolla

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More quotes by Adam Carolla

The constant ingestion of fear about shit that will never happen is ruining our society.

Rape is not a sexual crime. It is not sexual. Rape is a violent crime... it's a violent crime, where you cum at the end. It's no different than if you robbed a liquor store... and then came.

Once you become a famous famous celebrity, like me, and people start writing about you in the press, you'll notice just how incompetent reporters are. [...] Everyone should have a reporter follow them around and interview them for an article in the newspaper. Then sit back and watch how much stuff is inaccurate.

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Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Adam Carolla (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.