If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer.

Misattributed to George Bernard Shaw on The West Wing, Season 2, Episode 14: The War At Home. Fictional President Jed Bartlet, smoking a cigarette, spoke the second half of the quote and attributed it to Shaw. His chief of staff Leo McGarry disputed whether it was Shaw, and the President concurred.