“Bless him”—the Messiah raises a shiny copy of the New Apocalypse Edition of the Book of Frick—“for leaving us this miraculous book, this new edition of his Holy Word, available for only nineteen ninety-nine at Church of America megastores worldwide.”

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Quote text and notes from Wikiquote: Katie Coyle (page history), available under CC BY-SA 4.0. Source quality and labels are our own summary of what Wikiquote records.