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Terry Pratchett Quotes
1948–2015 England
Sir Terence David John "Terry" Pratchett, OBE (28 April 1948 – 12 March 2015) was an English humorist, satirist, and author of fantasy novels, especially comical works, most famous for his Discworld series.
England Activists Journalists Novelists Satirists Also known as: Pratchett, Pratchett, Terry, PTerry
Random Terry Pratchett quote
151 quotes
Go on, prove me wrong. Destroy the fabric of the universe. See if I care.
Keep 'em busy. That was one of the three rules of being chief that old Grimm had passed on to him. Act confidently, never say 'I don't know,' and when all else fails, keep 'em busy.
The Carpet People (1971)
The Deftmenes are mad and the Dumii are sane, thought Snibril, and that's just the same as being mad except that it's quieter. If only you could mix them together, you'd end up with normal people.
The Carpet People (1971)
The naughty ladies might give you a farthing for setting a gentleman’s footsteps in the right direction. As he grew older, he realized that some people would say that was, in fact, the wrong direction; there were two ways of looking at the world, but only one when you are starving.
Dodger (2012)
People were stupid, sometimes. They thought the Library was a dangerous place because of all the magical books, which was true enough, but what made it really one of the most dangerous places there could ever be was the simple fact that it was a library.
Guards! Guards! (1989)
Mort isn't fashionable UK movie material -- there're no parts in it for Hugh or Emma, it's not set in Sheffield, and no one shoves drugs up their bum...
He was still Dodger, of course, but what kind of Dodger? Because he was most definitely not the Dodger he had been a week ago. And he thought, if people change like this, how can you be sure about what you get and what you lose?
Dodger (2012)
Mmm, as I recall, if you go around telling people that they are downtrodden, you tend to make two separate enemies: the people who are doing the downtreading and have no intention of stopping, and the people who are downtrodden, but nevertheless—people being who they are—don’t want to know. They can get quite nasty about it.
Dodger (2012)
Every player is dealt a hand from the pack of cards, and the object appears to be to put together one complete family, the happy family, simply by asking one of your opponents if they have a particular card. It would seem a cheerful game for children, but in fact, if they only did but know it, the parents are setting the child on the way to be a poker player or, worse, a politician.
Dodger (2012)
I mean, I wouldn't pay more than a couple of quid to see me, and I'm me.
They called themselves the Munrungs. It meant The People, or The True Human Beings.
The Carpet People (1971)
On building the clacks, at alt.fan.pratchett (18 June 2002)
What they did was sell invisible things. And after they’d sold what they had, they still had it. They sold what everyone needed but often didn’t want. They sold the key to the universe to people who didn’t even know it was locked.
The Wee Free Men (2003)
You can't go around building a better world for people. Only people can build a better world for people. Otherwise it's just a cage. Besides you don't build a better world by choppin' heads off and giving decent girls away to frogs.
Witches Abroad (1991)
The anthropologists got it wrong when they named our species Homo sapiens ('wise man'). In any case it's an arrogant and bigheaded thing to say, wisdom being one of our least evident features. In reality, we are Pan narrans, the storytelling chimpanzee.
Tolkien's dead. J. K. Rowling said no. Philip Pullman couldn't make it. Hi, I'm Terry Pratchett.
Death isn't online. If he was, there would be a sudden drop in the death rate. Although it'd be interesting to see if he'd post things like: DON'T YOU THINK I SOUND LIKE JAMES EARL JONES?
"I would just like to draw attention to everyone reading the above that this should be interpreted as 'I am not dead'. I will, of course, be dead at some future point, as will everybody else."
Oh, come on. Revelation was a mushroom dream that belonged in the Apocrypha. The New Testament is basically about what happened when God got religion
AT LAST, SIR TERRY, WE MUST WALK TOGETHER.
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