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Louis C.K. Quotes
born 1967 United States
Louis Szekely (born September 12, 1967), known professionally as Louis C.K., is a Mexican-Irish-American stand-up comedian, who has been active since 1985.
United States Actors Agnostics Comedians Editors Also known as: Louis CK, Louis Szekely
Random Louis C.K. quote
30 quotes
Now we live in an amazing, amazing world and it’s wasted on the crappiest generation of spoiled idiots.
Conan (2006)
If you do something and people think you’re stupid, just go for crazy. You get more respect that way because nobody likes stupid people.
Drugs are so fucking good that they’ll ruin your life.
Saying that something is too terrible to joke about is like saying that a disease is too terrible to try to cure it.
Everything that’s difficult you should be able to laugh about.
People say ‘my phone sucks.’ No it doesn’t! The shittiest cellphone in the world is a miracle. Your life sucks. Around the phone.
I have spent my long and lucky career talking and saying anything I want. I will now step back and take a long time to listen. Thank you for reading.
They charged me 15 dollars. That's how much it costs to only have 20 dollars.
‘Fuck it.’ That’s really the attitude that’s keeps a family together. It’s not ‘We love each other!’ It’s ‘Fuck it.’
Trump is not your best. He's the worst of all of us. He's a symptom to a problem that is very real. But don't vote for your own cancer. You're better than that.
When girls go wild, they show their tits to people. When women go wild, they kill men and drown their kids in a tub.
Friends should always tell you the truth. But please don’t.
I don't have a gun, but if I did, I would shoot a baby deer in the mouth and feel nothing.
How many advantages can one person have? I'm a white man!
I’ve started to kind of hate people, and it’s not because I have anything against them. It’s just, I enjoy it. It’s recreation.
That’s what being a parent is like. It’s like Platoon.
I think of boxing a lot with standup. I even train with boxing trainers
It’s in the Ten Commandments to not take the Lord’s name in vain. Rape isn’t up there, by the way. Rape is not a Ten Commandment. But don’t say the dude’s name with a shitty attitude.
Credibility lasts about two cycles of bad material, and then you’ll probably never get it back. If you let people down, that’s really hard to come back from– harder than climbing from nothing to something, even.
There’s a huge amount of work that goes into placating a network in regular television. It’s literally 70% or 80% of your workload, is showing them the material, getting their notes and presenting it to them and making sure they weigh in. It’s a huge amount of work.
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